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Kan du bli min ersättare?

Idag kom jag på den fantastiska idén att skaffa en ersättare. Som en sådan kanske du kan ta över min sjukdom ett par veckor, för det är några saker jag behöver göra.

Dels skulle jag behöva lite semester med ordentlig avkoppling. Du har väl precis haft semester nu, så det borde ju ligga bra till tidsmässigt. Jag tänkte resa någonstans någon vecka. Till något av alla de där ställena man åker för att sola, bada och ha kul. Vilken lycka att kunna sitta i solen tills man är alldeles varm och sedan hoppa i havet. På kvällarna skulle jag gå ut på diverse restauranger och smaka på den inhemska maten och dryckerna.

Jag skulle inte ens tänka på vad som händer om jag värmer upp mig ordentligt i solen, inte tänka på att jag kanske inte kan hoppa vare sig i eller ur havet eller hur jag skulle ta mig dit. Jag skulle gå in och ut från restauranger och barer utan att ens fundera över om jag skulle ta mig fram med rullstolen. Alltså en helt vanlig semester.

Sen skulle jag behöva en vecka för att fixa lite här hemma. Du vet, sådant där som alltid inte riktigt blir gjort. Som att göra rent ugnen. Att klättra upp för att göra rent överst på garderoberna. Tänkte också passa på att röja i förrådet som ser ut ungefär som det gjorde då vi flyttade hit för snart 2 år sedan. Jag lovar att jag ska le hela tiden och gotta mig åt att jobba så att svetten lackar. Om du vill kan jag komma hem till dig och städa också.

I gengäld behöver du bara sitta hemma hos mig eller ta med dig sjukdomen hem till dig. Du behöver inte tänka på mediciner, för den tiden är förbi. Efter jobbet kommer du att vara lite slutkörd så du kommer nog inte att göra något annat än att ligga på sängen och läsa en bok. Det blir väl mysigt att ha tid med? Har du tur så lagar din partner lite mat åt er på kvällen. Du kan låna min ståstol annars, så du kan stå vid spisen en stund. Den är lite svårt att komma intill med, men det ordnar du säkert. Handla och så kanske någon annan kan göra åt dig. 

Om du vill gå ut ett tag så kom ihåg att ta med dig rullstolen om du planerar att gå mer än ett 50-tal meter, annars är det risk att du inte orkar gå hem. Ungefär som om du haft proteser på båda underbenen. Lite jobbigt, men du vet, shit happens. 

Sen är det där med vänsterbenet. Du kommer att känna hela dagen att det känns obehagligt. Det liksom bränner och svider och gör sig till. Ignorera det bara. Frampå kvällen kommer det att bli sämre, men det är inget att göra åt. Det är ingen idé att tro att du ska värma fötterna när du ska sova, eller att du ska kyla ner dem, för om du känner på dem så kommer du att märka att de har en fullt normal temperatur. Inget att göra åt, det är bara några nervtrådar som virrat till sig så försök att ignorera och sova istället.

Och du, kom ihåg att boka arbetsresor i tid, liksom om du vill göra någon privat resa. Du måste komma ihåg att det är en fantastisk förmån att få hjälp med förflyttningar, så bli inte sur när du får vänta på bilen och när du får samåka med andra och åka runt stan för att hämta och lämna folk lite här och där. Tänk istället att det är kul att komma ut och se sig omkring lite.

Sist, men inte minst viktigt: bli inte rädd om det händer något. Jag menar om du tappar känseln någonstans, om du glömmer bort vilket år det är, om du vinglar, tappar balansen eller ramlar. Det är inte heller farligt att tappa ord och att sluddra lite eller att inte känna igen folk. Det är helt naturligt och det kommer bara att bli sämre, så ta det lugnt. Jag kommer snart och tar över.

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